Craving

I am craving a spanking. Punishment.

I crave it - long for it - and would actually beg for it if the man in my life were capable of delivering, which he's totally not.

I need the sting, the humiliation, the submission. Need to be dominated, controlled.

Nothing turns me on more.

I hate thinking of other things while he's eating me out just so I can get off...but that's what I do.

I've tried to explain it to him. He has tried to understand. But the simple fact of the matter is that he has no self-confidence; almost non-existent self-esteem. He is incapable of taking charge of me in the bedroom...or anywhere else for that matter.

I swear, if I don't get to release the steam valve and let some of this out soon I'm going to fucking explode.